Don’t order coffee in Ireland

If you feel like a coffee in Ireland, I suggest you go to a pub and order a Guinness. Photo by David Lansing.

I am sorry to say that you cannot get decent coffee in Ireland. I’ve tried everything. The coffee served at my hotel in Dublin was so bad that on the third morning I went to the bar and ordered an espresso and then watched as the lovely young woman pulled a shot that tasted like that godawful chicory concoction they serve in the South.

The next morning I ordered breakfast then hurried down the street to a coffee bar and ordered a latte that must have been made with the leftover malted barley from Guinness. The Irish don’t seem to have heard of fresh roasted coffee beans. Or maybe they’re using Nescafe in their espresso machines. Hard to say.

This morning in the dining room of the Castlemartyr resort, I asked Emilie, my waitress, to tell me honestly if they knew how to make good coffee.

Oh we do, she said brightly. People say it’s the best in Ireland. French press, she boasted. Steeped for a full three minutes.

So I ordered it. It was hot. It was ebony. And it tasted like ashes.

So now I’m done ordering coffee in Ireland. Forever more. From now on, it’s tea for breakfast. Even though Irish tea is basically just a cup of Lipton’s. Better yet, from now on when I feel like a cup of coffee maybe I’ll just wander down to the local pub and get a Guinness. It’s just as dark and about the same temperature as a cup of Irish coffee.

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4 comments

  1. William’s avatar

    You’re just about right as there are a few good coffee shops out there. Of course you were here on holiday so what, just here a week or two so you didn’t have time to explore. It took us six months to find a shop in Galway that serves really good coffee so like you, we suffered through many bad cups of coffee.

    That was one big reason we started roasting our own beans, we’re on a mission to bring good coffee to the Emerald Isle.

    Well before you make your next visit drop us a line and we’ll give you a list, a short list, of some really good coffee shops.

  2. David Bronson’s avatar

    Would you be kind enough to send me the list of good coffee shops, I’m leaving for Ireland on Monday, Thank You for your Help. David

  3. Colin’s avatar

    David, the Irish serve excellent coffee. I’d love to know the name soy the places you visited as you seem to have been very unlucky. In Dublin, I’d recommend the Bald Barista –

    http://thebaldbarista.com

    http://www.tripadvisor.com/Restaurant_Review-g186605-d2263828-Reviews-The_Bald_Barista-Dublin_County_Dublin.html

    As for your comparison between coffee and Guinness, as the Irish would say, ‘you’re talking shite’.

  4. j’s avatar

    the person who claims he never got a decent cup of coffee in ireland, should consult with his doctor and have his mouth and tasting senses checked.

    I did drink plenty of coffee, but none of the tradional irish coffee, and found that every morning, no matter where, I had excellent tasting coffee, much better than the fast foodies in the U.S.

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